Rosyth GE

Read through this extract and :

a) Comment on what you have read

b) Write your own great brginnings through the reply boxes.

 I’ve been thinking a lot about opening sentences recently. The book I’m writing at the moment started because one day this whole sentence came into my head -

 ”I’ve never told this story to anyone because when I was 11 I swore an oath in blood never to tell it.”

I liked the sentence – it intrigued me and it posed all sorts of questions: what happened when this person was 11? Who did he swear the oath with? Why can he tell it now? From that one opening sentence I kept asking questions and coming up with answers. I have now written 75,000 words of a book!

Opening sentences have been important for me since my first book – I wrote that book for a Year 9 class I was teaching. I’d told them I could write something good and I wanted to prove I could. So I wanted to grab them from the very first line. The book was ‘Collision Course’ – have a look at what I wrote. It worked – my class wanted to know what the dare was. They wanted me to go on reading. I’d got them hooked. Since then I’ve always tried to do the same thing: grab my reader from the first line. You’ve got a list of some of my opening sentences – so you can see how I’ve tried to do that.

Now it’s your turn. What you’re aiming for: Something to fire the imagination of reader. Make the reader want to know what happens next – something that pulls them into the story. Makes them ask questions – who is this, what’s happening, what’s going to happen? Not really looking for scene setting or establishing character – that comes later.

It’s about grabbing the reader – a bit like saying to your best mate – “hey – you’ll never guess what happened to me last night.” They’re bound to say “what???”

Dramatic openings should try and put you right in the middle of things. One of the best opening sentences I know is from George Orwell’s book ‘1984′:

“it was a bright cold day in April and the clocks were striking 13.”

There’s a great balance to that sentence – the first half seems ordinary and reassuring and then, bang, he hits you with the twist. Clocks striking 13 – what kind of world is this? So how about trying to come up with a killer opening sentence for a one of these stories? (if you want, you can make it more than one sentence – a killer opening two sentences or short paragraph):

a murder story- from the point of view of the detective investigating, or from the murderer’s eyes fantasy story for young kids – involving witches, or wizards or trolls or dragons. love story – people meeting and falling in/out of love horror/ghost story – an empty building or dark woods. Someone alone. family drama – some big event that’s going to tear a family apart – a secret or an accident or an arrival. science fiction – set in space or in a future that we can hardly recognise. Good luck! I’m looking forward to reading what you come up with. I warn you, though – if there’s something really good I might pinch it for my next book!!!!!

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Alice

I was stuck in the cupboard gasping for breath. I could hear them arguing in the kitchen, dishes being smashed against the door.

Nigel Hinton This is good and dramatic.

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As I was walking home I could see a bright light coming from the end of the lane. It was blinding. They’d come to see me again, the fairies. Nigel Hinton I like this, Alice, but I think you should have held back the information that the light came from ‘fairies’ until later in the story. The opening two sentences are intriguing then you give things away too quickly.

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Nick Suspense

Why? Why did it happen to me? That day? That year?

Nigel Hinton Nick – like the suspense suggestion. Questions are always a good way of getting the reader involved.

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Science Fiction. There we were floating in space. No one to help us. Then it happened. Science Fiction The shadow of the ship covered us, it oozed green slime, almost life-like Spy fiction The figure sprinted in the opposite direction, he seemed to turn toward an ally. I raced to pursue. Nothing only a solid brick wall

Nigel Hinton Mark and Tom -

a great creative team. The Sci Fi stuff is terrific. Great rhythm in the sentences and ace ideas. I love the end of the Detective one – the blank wall. What’s happened? Exactly what you want the reader to feel.

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Roland Young Crime Friction

The inventors of ‘Supagrip’ may not have anticipated the use to which I would put their product.

Nigel Hinton Roland – I laughed out loud sitting here alone at my desk. A brilliant start. ——————————————————————————–

Sarah Lowman Fantasy

As I walked through the field of poppies I felt drowsy, and I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw a dozen or so small fairies dancing among the flowers. Nigel Hinton Sara L – a good start for the fantasy idea. Sets the mood and is intruiging. Like the idea that the vision might be caused by the druggy poppies.

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Nick Crime Fiction The blood, it was everywhere, blood, the smell of death, the eeryness of the room!

Nigel Hinton Nick – blood is always an attention grabber then when you add the smell of death – irresistible. You’ve got it, mate!

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 Sam Wass Crime fiction

Sam slipped into the apartment, the necklace dangling from his pocket. Horror It was clear night, the moon was shining through the trees but what was that moving in the clearing.

Nigel Hinton Hold on a minute – am I dealing with professionals here??? Sam – a really terrific start to a detective story. This stuff is guaranteed to make people read on.

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Sarah Lowman Horror

I was alone in the house, my parents were out but there was this strange creaking sound coming from the cellar Fantasy I was playing in the garden. It was all tranquil and calm, but I knew something was watching me. Then from the corner of my eye I saw it.

Nigel Hinton Sarah – I like both of them but think I prefer the Fantasy. I like that balance you get – everything’s OK but… I’d read on for sure!

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David Tree Horror 1

 I felt the pain as the blood gushed out of my fearful heart. Horror 2 The dagger of doom was raised above my head and the fear came dribbling. Pain rolled down my face. Horror3 The dark and spooky building made my skin stand up on end and the shivers went down my spine. Nigel Hinton David – you instantly get the reader in the mood for the thrills and blood to come! Terrific

Extracted and adapted from “Great Openings”by Nigel Hinton